How to Network Your Blog: 7/27/16

Yes. I tried this when I first started my blog, and it works! 🙂

Dream Big, Dream Often


Here’s how to network your blog. The work is done for you, all you have to do is LIKE, COMMENT and FOLLOW others.  The more you network with other blogs, the more other blogs will network with you!

(click How to Network Your Blog to view yesterday’s post)

Being Lydia

Tom Slatin

Harsh Reality

Susie Lindau’s Wild Ride

Insane Roots

Rendezvous En New York

Lucky Otter’s Haven

Peace from Panic

Getting Fit for Forty

Second Wind Leisure Perspectives

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Is Your Diet Affecting Your Mental Health?

I have believed this since I was a teenager. More recently my wife would get upset when I would blame her emotional bursts on a bad diet. Is it my fault that I see her as a perfect angel, and I see her diet as the problem? 😉

Can your diet play a role towards mental health? Yes, it can. A good diet that provides adequate amounts of complex carbohydrates, essential fats, amino acids, vitamins and minerals and water is essential for enhanced mood and an overall feeling of wellbeing.

Often, the role of nutrition is under-recognized as a leading factor contributing towards mental health. If you read the WHO official mental health definition, you’ll understand that mental health is nothing but a state of well-being in which every individual realises his/her potential and can cope with the normal stresses of life.

The Mental Health Act of 1987 is described as An Act to consolidate and amend the law relating to the treatment and care of mentally ill persons, to make better provision with respect to their properly and affairs and for matters connected therewith or incidental thereto.

Mental Health and Your Diet


Research studies have found…

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The Ugly Truth: Part 2

I am also starting to wonder if there are other factors in this need to cause pain either to others or to myself.  Like in the movie “Secretary” I reviewed a few days back, maybe it is because I am suppressing too much emotional pain that I have to let it out physically some how.  Maybe it is from being in so much debt and the leaky condo expenses going up.  Or maybe it is the people at work driving me crazy with the same conversations every time I see them.  I want a better paying job and more intelligent conversation, but I am afraid it will come with more stress, so is there any benefit?

And then again, is this a spiritual attack or test?  They say that the body is weak, so is Satan trying to tempt me into thinking that I enjoy giving pain by sexually arousing me when I think of it?  Is this a test that if I ignore it, it will go away?  Or do I have to try it?  My wife and I tried some light bondage and submission, last year and we found after a month or so that it did boost our confidence and built love and trust between us.  But that was enough for us, it resolved our curiosity and we are stronger for it.  I haven’t had the need to go back there until now.

Maybe it is the heat?  I see ladies walking on the street in skimpy outfits, and I think “She is selling it”, “She really wants it”, “She is a tease, and someone should teach her a lesson”.  Of course I know that this is just temptation talking, and most ladies wear clothing that they find comfortable and cool.  It looks like they are trying to show off their cleavage, but they’re actually venting the extra heat that builds up there.  But the heat plays games with a man’s mind, especially when he is a lonely sex deprived bachelor.

When I know why things bother me, they don’t bother me any more because I can say that it is just the sugar or it is just the heat, and the feelings go away.   But then again, maybe I just needed to talk / write about it, because I don’t have those temptations anymore.

Thanks for listening.   🙂

The Ugly Truth: Part 1

I have been away for a while for a variety of reasons, but mostly because I couldn’t think of what to write.  My life has been going well, and I seem to write when things are going wrong.  But I have noticed that my diet is controlling a major part of my life, and I thought I would share how.

I really have to watch my sugar and gluten intake, the combination of the two turns me into a different person, and one that scares me.

In the past few weeks I have been feeling small flashes of anger, but have found no reason for it.  So I have been increasing my antidepressant, but I don’t notice much difference.  Some people get like this from drinking alcohol, I get the anger from too much sugar.  I usually am successful at avoiding it, but sometimes I forget or just get tired of being on such a strict diet.  And why does anger bring out the need for sex in men?  I don’t know, but that is probably why the F-word is used when people are angry.

Also, I am gluten intolerant.  For me that means that normal wheat bread turns to a rock in my stomach.  I have noticed that with this constipation I have naughty thoughts, and it makes me wonder if that is where the expression “You are full of shit” comes from.  So when constipation meets anger my thoughts are very scary.  I have tried to talk about these thoughts before to get them out in the open so that they lose their power, but I couldn’t even write about them until now.

The idea that pain is pleasure draws me in.  The thought of causing someone pain gets me excited, just as much as the thought of causing myself pain to get pleasure.  These are totally illogical thoughts, thoughts that I would not normally have when I avoid these foods.

When this happened in the past I typically had a fight with my wife and I would fantasize about disciplining her.  However, I know that I couldn’t hurt anyone even if I tried, especially her.  So instead I would end up trying out the discipline on myself.  I still do on occasion try and see how much pain I can endure for how long.

These days I don’t have anything or anyone to be angry at, so I know that it is the sugar and gluten.  Knowing that doesn’t make it go away.  Instead I end up having urges that I can’t talk about or act on, so I resort to getting naughty pictures on the Internet.  My wife says that I should tell her when I have these needs, but I don’t want to be angry when we make love and end up hurting her.  

If I dig deep down I think the real reason I can’t talk is that anger and depression don’t want you to be around people who can help you.  They want to stay in control of you, so they tell you that no one can help you, and that you have to take care of yourself.  Misery loves company, so unless the person is also miserable, it wants you to stay away from them, unless you can bring them down too.

So, I do my best to stay away from sugar and eat healthy balanced meals.

Movie Review: “Secretary” (2002)

I came across this movie by accident some time back, and then found the trailers on YouTube.  It sounded interesting, so I looked it up and found that it was available on Video On Demand with our cable company.  I showed the trailers to my wife and we watched it.

The movie stars James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhaal and they do some very good acting of some very quirky behaviour.  What I like about the movie is that these two quirky people work together and they find that their quirks complement each other.

The story starts out with Maggie’s character being released from the mental hospital.  Her problem is that when she gets depressed she hurts herself.  She applies for a job as a secretary for Spader’s character, who I think is shy but strict lawyer with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) or something like it.  He is very hard to work with, and goes through secretaries so fast he has a “Secretary Wanted” lighted sign outside like a motel would have a “Vacancy” sign.

The moment these two meet there seems to be some attraction, but they keep it professional.  He goes easy on her at first, but gets increasingly more strict when she makes typos.  He is impressed that she is willing to do demeaning jobs without question, like going through the dumpster to find a report he accidentally threw out.

He has seen her hurt herself when she is angry or depressed, and so after awhile he has a talk with her and basically orders her not to do that anymore, and to dress more professionally.  Well, this is just what they both needed, and they both become more confident because of this.  She becomes more confident because of the care and interest he is taking in her, and he is more confident because of how well she is responding to his instructions.

One day he takes a big risk and disciplines / spanks her for typos.  He is a lawyer and knows that this could be the end of his career, if she sues him for sexual harassment.  But his gamble pays off, sort of.  She doesn’t sue him, and her typing does get better, until she starts making mistakes deliberately.

That’s as much of the story as I am going to tell, but I just love how she (the submissive one) becomes the instigator in the relationship.  I guess you could say she is a bit of a brat in that respect.

In “50 Shades of Grey”, Christian vents his frustrations on women he pays to take it, until he falls in love with Anastasia who was a virgin.  He tries to convince her to be submissive in this way, but it just turns her away.  

In “Secretary” neither one knows what they want until it happens.  Then they both thrive in the new lifestyle together.  I really think it is a good example of how someone can build another person up, one by taking an interest and caring, and the other by listening and doing as asked.

This guy went from mental breakdown to mentally healthy because of this one thing.

Anxious Accessories

So if you’re a reader of our blog you’ll know that Kall is suffering a pretty serious blow of difficult mental health right now.

It was over 2 years ago that Kall was first told that he needed to go onto a disability pension. That his mental health, at least for the foreseeable future, was in crisis and he needed serious, very serious, help.

It’s not something that we share a lot but it’s really important for Kall to see that his mental health has significantly improved in those two years.

We would have to catch the bus and Kall would be unable to sit and wait for the bus.


We went to serious therapy, we’ve moved a lot, been homeless and treated badly, had nights without heat or food or power.


But one thing changed his mental health.

About a year ago we got a puppy. He was…

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